Prologue
Closer and closer to mankind comes their Reckoning: yet they heed not and turn away. Never comes aught to them of a renewed Message from their Lord, but they listen to it as in jest. – Sūrah 21 Al-Anbiyā’ The Holy Qur’an.
Farah looked up from the vile floor of the slaughterhouse. Weak with hunger and thirst, she tried to focus on the blurred figures standing over her.
“Will you consider my offer now?”
A corpulent face framed by a well-maintained beard exuded confidence. It was the face of a man accustomed to getting his way. His smile was a wicked sneer.
The stench of blood from the slaughtered goats made Farah nauseous. She struggled to speak.
“I cannot marry you. I would have no honor among your wives. They are young and pretty, and I am ruined by age and hunger.”
“You do not need to be pretty to do your tasks in my house.”
The harsh voice echoed in the room, sending shivers down Farah’s spine. She wept. The weight of the Judge’s request was more than she could bear. She was close to choosing death to escape the dishonor this man had heaped on her family.
“The scrolls tell us that a widow whose husband has died as a martyr must wed to the man’s brother or commander. Where is your husband’s brother?”
Her step-brother’s memory brought fresh sobs. “He died last year in the battle against the government forces.”
“I was their commander, so you must accept my offer.”
The widow lay on the dirty stone floor and retched. This devil had killed her brother-in-law and husband to enslave her and take the family’s land and all it had produced.
“I will not marry you. Give me a knife to cut out your eyes.”
The judge turned to his henchmen, nodded to them, and left the room.
They snatched the widow off the ground and bound her ankles and wrists.
One guard leaned in close, holding Farah immodestly. “You will be delicious entertainment for the apostate villagers,” he said.
Farah became disoriented when they pulled a hood over her head and tossed her in a wagon. When she could no longer hear anyone near, she prayed aloud for a merciful death.
Copyright © 2024 Daniel W. Hinson
All rights reserved.
This is the first draft of the opening to the book, Whispers in the Desert. To avoid steering the reader with more explanation, I’ll leave off further information until later.
My attempt here is to use a more concise narrative structure and let the character dialog tell the story. You are introduced to the antagonist and his victim, an innocent woman. Both will form the basis of the story.
Despite its harsh beginning, does this introduction make you want to read more? If I didn’t capture your interest here, the story will likely lie stillborn on my office floor.
Another challenge is the theme of the story. Writing skill is required to keep it interesting enough to invite the reader into the environment, period, and culture. Let’s see how I do.
Feel free to offer your opinion, as this is a story still in the making. You’ll get to see it all in first-draft form.
Hyperion Sky 
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