Whispers of the Desert 6

The Witch of Old Isaiah

Exhausted from the heat and constant labor of winnowing the grains from the sand and husks, the men bid each other a safe journey home. Amir would see them the next day, as he did every day except the Sabbath. He and his parents spent the day in the mosque listening to Imam Farid chiding his sheep to follow the ancient laws and walk daily with God.

Amir waved at the group as they collected mats and stainless steel lunch pails. “God be with you, brothers.”

“And to you, brother Amir.” Leaving the back-breaking work behind, they walked down the hill to the path that led to the old city.

“Another day, another shekel.” The oldest of the group was always humorous. His playful nature made the work tolerable – almost.

Laughter crept across the scattering men, a sign of their anticipation for the evening prayer that marked the end of the day. It was a moment they all looked forward to, a brief respite from the back-breaking work they endured.

Dusty field workers stopped as the imams sounded the evening prayer in the towers. A High Imam started, and across the old city, the other minarets picked up the Ash-Shu ‘arā,’ songs of the Poets. The melody carried across the city to the fields, warning the faithful of the punishments reserved for the unbelievers. Amir rolled out his prayer rug and, facing the eastern sun low on the horizon, listened to the enchanting prayers echoing across the land.

An hour later, Amir ensured everything was ready for the next day. The shovels and rakes lined up, and the cleaned grain bagged and placed in the collection bin, marking the end of his day. He locked the heavy wood door to the mud and stone building and descended the path. The sun was now blazing a golden carpet across the sky. 

When the baker’s son arrived home, he went straight to the courtyard at the back of the bakery and headed to the washroom, where his family cleaned clothes, bodies, and food. The scent of yeast, bread dough, and animal manure welcomed Amir home.

Below an open portal the size of a frying pan, a copper basin sat, turned green with age and filled with fresh water. A fresh towel, washcloth, and homemade lye soap bar were on the bench. Amir’s mother always anticipated his needs and presented him with a solution, showing her love and devotion. He smiled, thinking of how hard his life would be without his beloved parents.

Ladles of water ran over his head, and rivulets flowed down his body. He felt sore but refreshed as he lathered the grime off his skin and out of his long hair. His beard was short and wiry, his face and arms deeply tanned, contrasting with the lightness of his body, always shielded by his clothes from the pitiless sun. 

A swishing sound caught the naked Amir off guard. He looked out the portal in time to see a slender woman ablaze in the fading light of day. She wore an unorthodox ankle-length dress. The dress was a maze of Egyptian patterns in blue and black, contrasted with orange and yellow. Her short and rapid steps set the creases of her dress, rippling in slow motion. A scarf covered her head, marking her as an unmarried woman. On top of her head was a hand-woven basket filled with fresh vegetables and fruit from the market.

She was alone. Amir felt a strange sensation in the pit of his stomach, and his breath came in short, rapid gasps. As he watched her disappear from view through the opening in the wall, his fingers trailed down his chest to his aching genitals; he felt compelled to cover himself in shame from unwelcome thoughts.

43 responses to “Whispers of the Desert 6”

  1. Your natural power of description comes out in this piece, Daniel.

    The reader feels that they’re there – the heat of the sun, the toiling work in the fields, the chants of the imams across the town and land.

    The welcoming fresh water and towel and soap.

    And your description of the alluring woman (to say nothing of the beautiful produced AI image of her).

    Amir is not the only one left with what the imam would no doubt consider impure thoughts.

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    1. Thank you Chris. Upon recommendations, I’ve added back in a little flair and flavor to the soup. Poor Amir. He tries so hard to be the righteous man. He is studying to be an Imam after all but, the worldly pleasures as well as the bedevilments follow him closely. It’s like Pan Goatee, he only wants to ride the bus to the corner store and he has to chop his way on the bus and off the bus. Aesthetics, like righteousness, can be a huge challenge.

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      1. Very true, Daniel, very true. 😂

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  2. You handled that situation nicely.

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    1. Thank you M. The conflict between our natural desires and social or religious constraint is a powerful force within. Most often, our natural tendencies win over more noble choices. Amir is struggling with his ideology and biology.

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      1. He’s in a delicate and he’s going into manhood and doesn’t quite understand yet. His religion weighs on him too. He’s admirable for now, men break at some point. For that matter, so do women. 🙂

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        1. The trials and tribulations of growing up and all he wants is to be a righteous person. The world has other plans for him.

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          1. Yes, it does. Sending hugs.

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  3. I love the direction your story is taking Dan. Wonderful images, Imam’s are human.

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    1. Thank you Rene. You definitely picked up on that constant struggle many face today. We cannot live a happy life until we find a balance between who we naturally are and what we would like to be. I feel like this story has to show what happens when we are conflicted within and facing serious social issues at the same time. Amir must either succumb to the world or withdraw from it. That is a tough choice. I hope he chooses correctly.

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      1. He can’t join in without succumbing? We’ll see. I am excited to discover his alternatives. 🕊️😊

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        1. Ha ha ha! You already know the plot now. I’ll try not to give it away as to spoil the unfolding story. I’ll just say the crucible of life can forge an irresistible force for good if we don’t become slag in the process. Layla, the Witch, is no witch at all. I suspect that is why Amir’s spidey sense locked onto her.

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          1. Very exciting Dan! A wonderful storyline. Great job!

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            1. Thank you, Rene. This is the first story I’ve attempted where I had a detailed outline and chapters with notes ahead of time. I’m doing the editing behind the scenes and when I put the finished book up on the blog for download or online reading, it will be a little richer than the barebones version I’m posting now. I’m including a lot of subtle layers I hope readers will identify with.

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              1. I’m excited and looking forward to the published book Dan. This is the best way to write , put it down in the moment and then edit, edit, edit. ✍️ You are awesome and this is a great write.

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                1. I always appreciate your support and encouragement Rene. I think about that when I get stuck in a scene and wonder how to make it work. I ask myself, what would R & D do? They would meet the challenge head on and make it happen. That’s what I’ll keep doing.

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                  1. They absolutely do… And it’s all because you lead the way. I know this will be amazing.

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                    1. Woot Woot! I’m up for it. R&D update also coming soon.🎉🤗

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                    2. Stop teasing me! 🤗😊👍

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                    3. LOL 😂. Okay, I promise.

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                    4. I’m going to need a pinky swear.

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                    5. Pinky Promise 🤙🏼 The Lizard King Part II is coming up. Renate saves David and David in turn saves Renate, the two never realizing the lizards are like puppies and just want to play. 😁🦎

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                    6. But they finally become buddies and spend the day lying on the river rocks in the hot sun sun eating apple fritters. A grand finale right there. 😉🍎

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                    7. I really like this ending. I’m thinking of changing the flight from fright change of scenery to a lovely bon voyage from the friendly lizard crypt guards. The idea is they haven’t seen anyone in 10 generations and finally someone shows up and they are overjoyed and just want to have a meet and greet. All over a honey bun or two.

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      2. As much as I dislike religions, without it, humanity would be who they truly are: Psychotic killers. Of course, we’re STILL that (look at history and the state of the world today) but it least that behavior is not taking place on a Black Friday inside Walmart.

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        1. LMAO 😂 That Walmart can hold on in spite of its clientele on Black Friday is a testament to the fact we aren’t as bad off as we believe we are. I’ve come to the conclusion that religion does not change our human nature nor prevent any evil from happening. In fact, most people of religions live in deep apostasy contrary to the doctrines and covenants a religion may have. Paul and Akira had the right idea on how to make their new religion work. Hive mind and overt mystical powers. Now we are getting somewhere. I read where we should all reach singularity in 5 years. That might just solve the problem with the current systems.

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          1. “…live in deep apostasy contrary to the doctrines and covenants a religion may have.’… And that represents the ultimate hypocrisy. If only people would practice what they preach! Lol!

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            1. Exactly! Religions were wonderful until we humans got involved. That’s where it all goes straight to hell. 😈

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  4. It’s coming along nicely, Dan.

    Religion can make life arduous. It is a sword with many sides.

    I learned al lot about Islam over the years I designed the costumes for a TV series: Little Mosque on the Prairie.

    I look forward toe the next chapter!

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    1. Thank you Resa. I totally agree. Religion can urge us to do good as a counter to our dark nature but it can never cure us of our innate desires for worldly things often to excess. We will see that in Amir’s journey. Little Mosque on the Prairie sounds interesting. I’m sure that was an adventure creating the costumes.

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      1. I will be reading on!
        Yes, LMotP was an interesting adventure.

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        1. I always value your input Resa. So, if you see the story going upside down in the turtle ditch, let me know so I can rescue it.🫢😅

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          1. Lol! Will do, Dan!

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            1. Thank you, Resa 😃

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  5. You are much better off with people blowing smoke up your ass than me. Like Mole, if you don’t see the logic speedbumps, no one can help. The trick is to see the story and not to let anyone see you think your way through it.

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    1. I do appreciate hard slaps of reality. What you are seeing is me thinking my way through it illogically. While perfection is never my goal because it takes too long and I’m lazy. I am cranking these out and doing the beauty work behind the scenes. I’m keeping all the notes and do try to add as I go but this is the first run, no edits except spelling, punctuation and a half ass attempt at grammar. I had a different intent than posting chapters of a finished product. Perhaps that was a mistake but in discussing the merits or failures, we all learn a little something. The end result could be another Mona Lisa. That is one butt ugly painting but no one wants to come right out and say it. We would be admitting that for 400 years we haven’t produced a single useful art critic.

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      1. When you polish look at your scene logic and redundancy. If your workflow is describing a postcard start somewhere along the edge and work your way across without backtracking. The first three paragraphs of this one are probably three or four A to B sentences. And the girl with the basket…start at the top or the bottom and work your way down or up instead of doing a Betsy McCall cutout and taping her clothes on. I don’t really care what temperature the water is as long as it flows in line.

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        1. I’d honestly never thought about the scene flow in description. I do think about logic flow in dialog although dialog can be lots of circles and no arrows especially if alcohol is involved. I do think written dialog should flow toward an objective. I’ll give this a try. I’m sure there will be lots of trying before it becomes intrinsic.

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  6. Vividly written, Daniel. Hugs.

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    1. Thank you Teagan. This is my experiment to post a mildly edited story and let feedback steer the arduous editing task after the fact. I’m getting good feedback from readers and updating behind the scenes. It’s actually fun as it should be.

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